Sunday, February 15, 2009

Geezers Defined

What is a Geezer?
Some would imply that you reach Geezerdom after living a certain number of years. Well, it’s not that simple. Geezerdom is more of a state of mind than a tick on a calendar. It is marked by a real lack of concern over status, style, and schedule. A true Geezer can savor a quiet moment in the campground, take pleasure from the aching muscles following a good paddle, or stand a shift at the wheel when his buddy can’t drive another mile. He (or she) adopts a “get-along, go-along, sure, let’s try that” attitude.

GST Geezer Standard Time – whenever we damn well feel like doing something. Usually get up around 7:00, go to bed around midnight – flexible on everything else. There is no word for “hurry” in Geezer-Speak. The pointing of a bird, a tide change or closing time for a restaurant implies haste is necessary – no additional word needed.

Sanschain Eating – Avoiding the suburban blight of chain restaurants (Micky D’s, TGI Fridays, Chilis, Applebees, Dennys etc) Our criteria? Good food is a must - local speciality food preferred.! A small joint, off the beaten path is good. Cheap is preferred.

Geezer Road Speed - When towing the camper on the highway, traveling just enough below the prevailing traffic speed to be really annoying.

E-GAD! Erratic Geezer Avian Driving – Eyes on the skies for feathered conquests, ready to pull into the ding-weeds on the side of the road with no advanced warning. Accepting that it’s OK when both the passenger and driver are looking through binoculars at the same time! “Hey Mike! Are you steering?”

Geezer Drinking Behavior – See Sanschain eating for the basic criteria. No ferns, matching wallpaper or extensive menus of cute sounding drinks with fruity names like “peach fuzzy almond blast”. Preferably a beer selection that goes beyond “we got Bud, Bud Lite and Miller. What all ya want?” Pool table preferred, barmaid preferred (but not too cutesy – teeth optional). Talk to the locals if they seem approachable and safe.

Geezer Wardrobe – Casual is too formal a word. Old T-shirts & jeans by day, fleece pants and shirts at night. The sniff test to determine cleanliness doesn’t work – If the pants don’t come when called – they’re OK to wear another day.

Geezer Car Organization – It isn’t. However, certain standards apply. Binoculars on the dashboard, cameras within reach, wires all over the place for the GPS, i-Pod, 2 cell phone chargers and power inverter for the laptop (Hey – you think we waste valuable birding/eating/drinking time on this blog? We write on the road!) The back end has a pile of dead clothes, camping gear, paddling gear, fishing gear, snorkeling gear and whatever else couldn’t fit in the trailer.


  1. Geezer's also must carry a small change purse - you know, the kind you have to squeeze to open. Then, while paying any bill, but especially while in the checkout line at the register, you need to pull out the change purse and fumble through it until you can find exactly the right change for the amenities. One damn coin at a time ...

  2. This post was the highlight of my day!

  3. Darn, I qualify for this Geezer club, have been living it for a couple of years and did not know it!

    I'll keep following along til I head south on the 28th.

    BTW, which side of the Okefenokee did you guys paddle? East or West?

    Paddle on!